From: Bubba Rom Dos <bubba@dev.null>
Date: Wed, 16 Apr 1997 00:40:08 -0700 (PDT)
To: cypherpunks@toad.com
Subject: WebWorld 33-34
Message-ID: <3354828A.5DDC@dev.null>
MIME-Version: 1.0
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Title: The True Story of the InterNet







The True Story of the InterNet

Part II


WebWorld & the Mythical 'Circle of Eunuchs'


by Arnold


Copyright 1995, 1996, 1997 Pearl Publishing


BDS IV


Schultz arrived promptly at six o'clock. His aide handed both
the Cowboy and Melissa a newly acquired wardrobe, fit for a ceremony
of high distinction.

"Don't be long," Schultz admonished them, "the
Cowboy is the guest of honor."

The head guard at the main gate smiled as he looked at the paperwork
Schultz had presented to him. He had long had a personal enmity
with Schultz, resenting the way that he threw his weight around
in all areas of the facility, lording it over those who were actually
above him in authority.

"There is no paperwork on Dr. Adam's departure, Schultz.
I'm afraid that is quite unacceptable."

Schultz hefted a heavy, swift-moving boot into the guard's groin,
sending him, knees buckled, to the pavement, in enormous pain.

"Look again, friend.", Schultz said casually.

"Yes.", the guard groaned, handing back the paperwork
quickly, when it appeared that Schultz might repeat his performance,
"Everything seems to be in order."

They walked to the waiting limousine, with Schultz's aide thumbing
through the papers, mumbling,
"I know that I prepared the proper paperwork for Dr. Adams,
Mr. Schultz."

Schultz pulled a slip of paper out of his pocket, handing it to
his aide, with a grin, saying,
"You did. I hate that prick.", Schultz laughed, glancing
back at the guard, who was still on his knees, cursing in pain.


A short time later, the aide appeared to be quite nervous as he
pulled the limousine into the alleyway behind Bubba Rom Dos IV's
former 'safe-house'.

"I'm not so sure that this is a good idea, Mr. Schultz."

Schultz gave his aide a look of cold disdain for questioning his
judgment, with a hint of violent fury skirting his reply,
"Would you rather I had said, 'Please.', when I asked you
to turn in here?"

"No, sir. No, sir. I'm sorry, sir. Very..."

"Shut up, you imbecile!", Schultz roared, cutting the
man off.

The four of them stepped out of the limousine. Schultz asked the
Cowboy, with a tone of utmost courtesy,
"Any plans to escape, and leave your friends hung out to
dry, Cowboy?"

The question needed no answer. Schultz smiled serenely at his
aide, mocking his still-present fear, turned his back on the Cowboy
and moved towards the rear door of the 'safe-house'.

"Come, gentlemen," he turned to nod politely to Melissa,
"and ma'am, of course. Let's sit and have a short drink before
we continue. It will be the last chance we have to talk, I'm afraid."

Schultz led them through the building, past the chaotic disarray
resulting from the abrupt interruption of the previous night's
meeting, to a small room in the back. He sat gingerly down on
the small Afghani rug in the center of the small room, motioned
for the others to join him, and began pouring each of them a glass
of Jim Beam from the half-full bottle of Bubba's Private Reserve
that had been left behind in the chaos.

"You are not the only one who will be retiring after
tonight, Cowboy.", Schultz said, lifting his glass in toast
to his adversary, who returned the gesture.

"There is something I felt that I must share with you, Cowboy,
since it concerns both of us, and has for some forty-odd years.
It is something even my esteemed aide will find interesting, I
am sure," he lifted his glass in toast to his aide, who replied
in kind, "since it concerns something known only to myself
and the Shadow."

Everyone waited, with interest, for Schultz to continue. He drew
the moment out by pausing to fill everyone's shot-glasses.
"With your departure, Cowboy, Nuthouse Number Nine will cease
to exist."

"The Shadow had it built, as well as staffed and populated
with his best security forces," he paused to laugh, "including
Jesus#1 and Jesus#2-and myself-for the express purpose of being
ready to deal with the remote possibility of the appearance of
a dead man, or one of his heirs.
"The 'dead man'-whose body he had never personally seen,
and hence his allowance of the possibility he had lived-was the
Author, the man who wrote The Xenix Chainsaw Massacre-C.J. Parker
I.

"So now, you see, my career ends along with yours, Cowboy.",
Schultz toasted him once again.

"You really shouldn't have gone to all of that trouble, just
for me.", Cowboy told Schultz, facetiously.

"I'm glad he did.", Melissa enjoined, noticing, out
of the corner of her eye, the odd look that Schultz gave her.

"We really should be going.", the aide said nervously,
glancing at his watch.

"Yes, of course. Thank you.", Schultz nodded to his
aide, who appeared relieved that he had not angered Schultz, once
again.
"I have worked for the Shadow for forty-three years now,"
Schultz said, rising to his feet, "but I have been 'my own
man' for much longer than that.", he continued, pulling an
antique pearl-handled Colt 45 automatic out of his jacket, aiming
and firing it in one swift motion.

Schultz lowered the smoking firearm, placing it back in its holster,
and turned to the Cowboy, who stood staring at Schultz's dead
aide.

"Bubba D'Shauneaux IV, at your service, sir." He bowed
graciously, and smiled.


A Drive In the Country


"But why did you have to be so absolutely cruel and violet
with him?", Melissa asked Schultz, seeming perturbed at him.

The Cowboy and D'Shauneaux both laughed heartily at the question.

"Dr. Adams, if I had taken tea and crumpets with the Cowboy
every afternoon, then I think the Shadow might have suspected
something was amiss." D'Shauneaux told her.

The Cowboy and D'Shauneaux laughed again, at Melissa's embarrassment
at having asked such a naive question, with such an obvious answer.

"Well, I still think that you're absolutely abominable.",
Melissa said, in a huff, not really meaning it, but mad at them
for laughing at her so much.

They laughed, even more, at this.

The two men grew suddenly somber, as D'Shauneaux looked at his
watch and told the Cowboy,
"I suppose that you must be on your way, Cowboy. I'm sorry
that I can't accompany you."

"The Shadow would be less than pleased to see you, I'm afraid.",
the Cowboy shook his head. "And it will be far more effective,
psychologically, if I arrive voluntarily, on my own."

Melissa, looking at the Cowboy with great concern, saw him viewing
her with the same concern, as he spoke to D'Shauneaux, saying,

"You can watch over Dr. Adams, I trust, until this thing
is decided, one way or another?"

"Yes, of course.", came Schultz's immediate reply.

The Cowboy turned to Melissa, taking her gently in his arms.
"Thanks for everything, Doctor Melissa. I know D'Shauneaux
will take good care of you, he's the best."

It was strange for Melissa to think of this violent, abominable
man, as she so recently regarded Schultz, in charge of her safety.
The Cowboy seemed to sense her concern, telling her,
"Please. Do whatever he asks of you, it's important. The
lives of all of us will be hanging in the balance for the next
few hours. So try to remember, Melissa, that no matter what it
is he asks of you," a trace of a devious smile began to cross
the Cowboy's lips, "it may be the last request of a dying
man."

The Cowboy laughed uproariously at his own humor, and Melissa
was about to give him a tongue-lashing for suggesting such a beastly
thing, until she glanced at Schultz, and saw him blushing madly,
turning a bright beet-red. She instinctively toned-down her response
a bit, saying,
"I'll do nothing of the sort.", she saw Schultz, out
of the corner of her eye, looking like a puppy-dog that had just
been kicked, and she turned away, so that he wouldn't see her
blush as a result of the beyond-motherly emotions it evoked in
her.

"I'll walk you to the car, Cowboy.", she said, tugging
him along.

The two of them hugged one another for an eternity, then kissed
gently and Cowboy turned to leave. As he climbed behind the wheel
of the limousine, he looked up at Melissa, and admonished her,

"You know, Doctor, forty-three years is a long time for a
person to have to hide any display of basic humanity from constantly
watching eyes. I've no doubt that D'Shauneaux is very vulnerable
to you, now that he is in a position to actually let himself feel
years of repressed emotions, without fear of discovery."

Melissa glanced back at Schultz...D'Shauneaux, it was so confusing...with
concern, knowing the burden he must have had to bear, those many
years. The Cowboy knew that he had hit upon exactly the right
nerve to set Melissa up for his final teasing, as he said,
"So please, be gentle with him."
Melissa threw him a blistering glance, as he drove away.

"Men!", she swore, turning to walk back to the waiting
Schultz.

As they drove out into the countryside, where D'Shauneaux had
a lakeside cabin that had been waiting forty-some years for this
day to arrive, it was obvious that he was not comfortable with
small-talk, but even less comfortable with expressing his real
thoughts and emotions, which he had needed to guard so very closely
for so many years. He was also extremely uncomfortable with being
in Melissa's presence, now that he was fully free to express whatever
it was that he felt toward her, but unable to bring himself to
do so.

"My lord," she thought to herself, "he blushes
every time I look at him, for heaven's sake. How could I not have
noticed anything for all these years? How could he have
not shown any feelings for me all these years?"

All of their attempts at normal conversation had been short, and
had turned quickly into embarrassed silences. Melissa tried a
new tack, however, asking him,
"D'Shauneaux, is the danger really as severe as the Cowboy
says?"

"Yes, all that, and more.", he replied, comfortable
to be speaking of something that had been very important to him
for many years.

"It must have been very difficult for you, all these years,
living with that kind of knowledge, and being able to do nothing
but wait, and stay prepared. It must have been a terrible burden
on you."

"It had to be done...but, yes, it was difficult.",
D'Shauneaux took a deep breath, and Melissa knew that it was taking
every ounce of his courage to continue. "It was very difficult
working with you."

He had said it, without even a glance in her direction, as if
it were no big deal to have said it, but Melissa knew that it
would be a mistake to reply to his statement directly.

"I don't know where you and the Cowboy find that kind of
courage," she told him. "Knowing the little that I do,
I'm terrified...absolutely terrified." She let herself
shiver, which was not hard to do, thinking of what might be coming.

Melissa moved over in the seat, gently, sitting beside D'Shauneaux,
without looking at him.
"Do you think you could hold me just a bit? Please?"

D'Shauneaux put his big arm around her ever so gently, as if afraid
he might hurt her. She could tell that he felt awkward, but she
knew that he would get better at it...with practice.

Melissa closed her eyes and rested her head on his shoulder. She
would see to it that he got plenty of practice.


Chapter 33 - BSD IV / Chapter 34 - A Drive In the
Country