From: TruthMonger <tm@dev.null>
Date: Sat, 1 Nov 1997 10:18:28 +0800
To: cypherpunks@toad.com
Subject: CypherPunk HMO / Dr. Vulis & Dr. Grubor Presiding...
Message-ID: <345A8380.6F5F@dev.null>
MIME-Version: 1.0
Content-Type: text/plain



--- Forwards have been surgically removed -----

A collection of medical interview and medical record remarks
written by various paramedics, emergency room receptionists, and
doctors at major hospitals.

The baby was delivered, the cord clamped and cut and handed to the
pediatrician, who breathed and cried immediately.

Exam of genitalia reveals that TruthMonger is circus sized.

The skin was moist and dry.

Rectal exam revealed a normal size thyroid.

The patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.

She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life until
1989 when she got a divorce.

Between you and me, we ought to be able to get this lady pregnant.

The patient was in his usual state of good health until his airplane
ran out of gas and crashed.

I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical
therapy.

The patient lives at home with his mother, father, and pet turtle, who
is presently enrolled in day care three times a week.

Bleeding started in the rectal area and continued all the way to Los
Angeles.

Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.

She is numb from her toes down.

Exam of genitalia was completely negative except for the right foot.

While in the emergency room, she was examined, X-rated and sent home.

The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.

The patient was to have a bowel resection. However he took a job as a
stockbroker instead.

Occasional, constant, infrequent headaches.

Coming from Detroit, this man has no children.

Examination reveals a well-developed male lying in bed with his family
in no distress.

Patient was alert and unresponsive.

When she fainted, her eyes rolled around the room.

By the time he was admitted, his rapid heart had stopped and he was
feeling better.

Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.

On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it had
completely disappeared.

She has had no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she
was very hot in bed last night.

The patient has been depressed ever since she began seeing me in 1983.

I will be happy to go into her GI system, she seems ready and anxious.

Patient was released to outpatient department without dressing.

I have suggested that he loosen his pants before standing, and then,
when he stands with the help of his wife, they should fall to the floor.


The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be
depressed.

Discharge status: Alive but without permission.

The patient will need disposition, and therefore we will get Dr. Blank
to dispose of him.

Healthy-appearing, decrepit 69 year old male, mentally alert but
forgetful.

The patient refused an autopsy.

The patient has no past history of suicides.

The patient expired on the floor uneventfully.

Patient has left his white blood cells at another hospital.

Patient was becoming more demented with urinary frequency.

The patient's past medical history has been remarkably insignificant
with only a 40 pound weight gain in the past three days.

She slipped on the ice and apparently her legs went in separate
directions in early December.

The patient experienced sudden onset of severe shortness of breath
with a picture of acute pulmonary edema at home while having sex which
gradually deteriorated in the emergency room.

The patient left the hospital feeling much better except for her
original complaints.